One Bad Bumper Sticker

Earlier today, I saw a bumper sticker that stuck out to me. 

It read:

Unless you are a hemerrhoid, get off my butt!

Well, the word butt was replaced with another choice word, but given the nature of family audiences, I have changed it to be more "sanitary."

Now, don't get me wrong. I am a fan of bumper stickers and honestly, I get the point of this one. Still, upon a closer investigation, the bumper sticker is actually scary. Nay, disturbing.

In essence, the person is actually suggesting that you should get off their butt unless you are a hemerrhoid. But, honestly, who really wants a hemerrhoid on their butt, either. Let's face it, there isn't too much you want on a butt and hemerrhoids are chief among them.

So, I am thinking that the bumper sticker should be rewritten. Something like:

Don't be a hemerrhoid...get off my butt.

Gets right to the point. Pleasantly!